The Joke That Went Way Wrong
by MrsLunaWeasley313
Summary: Hermione/Fred fic. Yes i know the characters are OOC. Just enjoy.
1. Chapter 1

**All credit goes to J.K. Rowling except for this plot line :)**

If anyone would've told me half a year ago I would be marrying Frederick Weasley I probably would have told them to go check into St. Mungo's. Now I'm sitting in front of the mirror while Molly, who insists I call her mum now, fixes my hair. Its my wedding day and everyone's here. Now you must be asking yourself how did you two fall in love and decide to get married so soon? Well to tell you the truth we're not in love. If it wasn't for a law we hadn't known about we wouldn't be here. I would still be running after Ronald and Fred would be dedicating all of his time to the joke shop. It's funny how one little joke can snow ball until were both so wrapped up in it we can't possibly get out.

Let me take you back 6 months ago, give or take a few days, I was just getting back from Australia after trying unsuccessfully to fix my parents memory. I showed up to the burrow in tears. I just couldn't understand what went wrong with the spell. I ran inside looking for Ron and Harry but instead ran head first into no other then Fred Weasley. "Wow Herms you in a hurry?" he joked, the seeing the tears running down my face started. "Hermione why are you crying? You've been here for 3 minutes is it Ron already?"

I started crying even harder to where I couldn't respond to what he was asking. He pulled me to his chest and started rubbing my back. It was very comforting for some reason. "Want to tell me whats going on Herms?" he asked soothingly.

"It..It's m-m-my parents I screwed up t-t-the mem-memory charm-m so they...they...still don't know who I am..." It finally fully hit me that I would never be able to go to my parents again and I collapsed in sobs. Fred picked me up and carried me to the sofa all the while whispering soothing things in my ears. "Hermione I am so sorry. You've been through so much already but you know you always have a place at the burrow and if not here you always have a place with George and I."

I smiled a sad smile, "Do you really mean that Fred? I mean we've never been really close but you have no idea how much that means to me." He dismissed it with a wave of his hand. "Oh now dear Herms here I thought we were the best of friends you've fatally wounded me now love!"

I couldn't help but burst out laughing with the ridiculous puppy dog look he had on. Mrs. Weasley came into the room then seeing me on Fred's lap she immediately went into mother mode. "FREDERICK WEASLEY YOU LET GO OF THAT GIRL THIS INSTANT!" Fred put on his best innocent face, "Mum I was just comforting her I swear we weren't snogging or anything honest!"

Mrs. Weasley then turned to me. "Well then. Hermione how did everything go in Australia? You look like you haven't eaten in months..." she cut off when she saw how puffy and red my face was. "Hermione sweetheart whats wrong?" she asked eyes filled with concern. I launched into telling her the entire story all the while Fred was squeezing my hand for reassurance. This didn't escape the watchful eye of his mother.

"So Fred, Hermione do you two have something to tell me? Something involving your hand holding?" She looked deadly serious. I went to say there was nothing to tell when Fred cut across me and said the fateful words that now have us where we are today. "Yes mum Herms and I are madly in love and are planning on getting married before the year is out." With that he rolled his eyes and started laughing which made me start laughing.

His mother however did not start laughing instead her face went deadly serious. "Fred Weasley! What did I tell you about taking the marriage word lightly! You may not have been serious earlier but you are now. According to wizarding law if a male wizard says he's marrying a female witch then its a legal binding verbal contract!" She looked sad, happy, excited, angry, and murderous all at once.

My mouth dropped to the floor she couldn't be serious I had never heard of this before it must be some ancient law! Why was it even still in the books? I looked over and saw Fred had gone deathly pale. "Mrs. Weasley surely this isn't really a law anymore?" I asked pleadingly.

She shook her head. "Hermione I'm sorry but it is. Out of all the irresponsible things you have done you've topped them off now. You two are going to have to marry before the year is out or face dire consequences."

"What kind of consequences?" I whispered. "Well sorry for having to say this sweetie but unless your parents object which they cant, if you two don't marry you will be sent to Azkaban for a term dictated by the Wizengomet." She said with that she left Fred and I to talk.

Fred looked at me at the same time I looked at him. "Well I guess we're getting married. Just two obstacles. 1) Fighting with mum over wedding plans..." I laughed at that, "2) We have to tell Ron and the rest of the family." he finished. Now it was my turn to go pale.

**Well I have no idea where Im going with this just a plot line buzzing in my head I wanted to get down if you like it let me know. I plan to keep going with it. Probably not gonna be my strongest but if I dont get these ideas down then I'll never get any of my stories written. Im also working on another story called the fifth marauder its a back in time sort of fic. Well R&R and maybe check out some of my other stories :) **


	2. Chapter 2

**Once again I don't own the story :) all goes to J.K. Rowling**

I sat through dinner barely eating anything I was lost in my thoughts. Fred Weasley was my fiancée, that sounded so foreign but pleasing at the same time.  
>NO! Stop it Hermione, he's your best friend's older brother he's probably never looked at you as anything more then an annoying bookworm.<p>

Now that I thoroughly depressed myself I looked up and saw Harry looking at me with a very concerned expression.  
>"Hermione...I've been trying to get your attention for the last couple of minutes. Are you okay?" His voice was filled with concern, which made me feel slightly guilty.<br>Before I could answer though Ron cut across me, "She's fine Harry probably just so concerned about N.E.W.T.S or something." he laughed at his own little joke.

I snapped, "Ronald I do have other things going on in my life but of course you wouldn't notice your head is far too up your arse to notice anything going on around you.  
>You're such a selfish git. I bet you didn't even think to ask me about how Australia went did you? No! Why would you concern yourself with one of your supposed best friends life!"<br>I was sobbing by the end of my tirade.

Ron and the rest of the Weasleys were speechless I ran out of the room crying out of fury and embarrassment. I was sitting in the garden crying to myself when I heard someone come up behind me.  
>"Harry I'm sorry I snapped like that it's just things didn't go well in Australia with my parents and there is a lot going on and..." I stopped when I noticed the figure behind me wasn't Harry but Fred.<p>

"Oh sorry Fred, I assumed it was Harry he always seems to be the one who runs after me when Ron and I have a row."  
>He chuckled a little. "Herms you gotta give me some credit, we are getting married so I think it's about time that I'm the one who chases after you.<br>Don't get me wrong though you had me and George about to burst with the look on Ron's face the entire time you yelled at him."

I smiled a small smile, "Well I'm glad my anger was amusing to you." He plopped down next to me and stuck his arm around me.  
>"If I do say so myself Miss Granger you look very sexy when you're angry although I'd rather be the one you're not yelling at!"<br>She blushed then started laughing. "That's nice of you Fred but I'm far from sexy as you put it more like awkwardly pretty." I said matter of factly.

"Oh Granger how you misjudge yourself. You are a very beautiful young lady if I do say so myself."  
>That made me blush even more, unable to resist though I said, "You wont be able to call me Granger much longer, soon I will be Mrs. Fred Weasley! What do you think of that?"<br>He laughed, "Hermione Weasley...Hmmm I never thought I would be the one to give you that last name."

"Neither did I.." Came a voice from behind us. We both froze eyes wide. "H..Harry I didn't hear you walk up."  
>I stammered trying to stay as calm as possible.<br>"Well I was worried when you still hadn't come back then I saw Fred leave after you and I'm not going to lie I became extremely curious and  
>well now...well now I'm even more confused honestly. So care to explain?" he finished silently.<p>

Fred looked at me and I decided might as well let the cat out of the bag.  
>I told Harry about everything that had happened starting from my parents to when Mrs. Weasley told us about the law.<br>He just sat there and gaped. "Oh wow Hermione I'm so sorry to hear about your parents, maybe we can get help and see if someone in the Ministry would know how to fix them.  
>As for the marriage, I mean I know you two aren't in love but there is potential.<br>You are aware of two things though: one wizarding marriages last until death there's no ending them,  
>and second Ron is probably going to try and kill Fred when he finds out."<p>

I grimaced, "Well honestly Harry I know about both but Ron is gonna have to deal with it.  
>I doubt if there wasn't a law Fred and I would be doing this we're not exactly doing this willingly.<br>I can only hope Fred and I will be able to make this marriage work though we have been friends  
>ever since they left school so atleast we have that to work with." At that I looked at Fred, who looked deep and thought<br>, grabbing his hand and squeezing it I said, "Well Fred might as well tell everybody tonight seeing as Harry knows now, and he can't keep a secret from anyone!"

Harry scowled, "I've kept many secrets I'll have you know but you're right I can't keep secrets from Ron, Ginny, or Luna for that matter."  
>Fred smiled, "Well are you ready my soon-to-be-wifey to tell everyone we're getting hitched?" I shook my head, "As ready as I'll ever be I suppose."<br>With that Fred stood up and offered me his hand and pulled me up. Harry smiled and gave me a big hug then gave Fred a handshake,  
>"Just to let you know she is my sister and I will kill you if you hurt her and remember I'm the one who killed Voldemort."<p>

Fred visibly gulped, at that Harry smiled. He went on and started walking to the house while Fred and I walked slowly behind him.  
>I didn't even realize it but we were still holding hands when we go to the back door. "Are you ready?" he asked me seriously.<br>I just sighed and shrugged my shoulders, "No" I said quietly.

**Well there it goes for chapter 2 I know the chapters aren't really long but like I said this story I'm just kinda doing for fun so no flames please! I know its not the best and there's probably spelling errors but I'm trying.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Once again J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter world. :) Well here comes the part we've all been waiting for Hermione and Fred telling Ron...dundundun Have fun reading :D**

Fred opened the back door of the burrow and with my hand still in his we walked into the kitchen where everyone was finishing up their deserts.  
>When everyone noticed us the room went deathly silent. I looked up and saw that Ron's face had turned a very bright red including the tips of his ears.<br>Mrs. Weasley gave us a knowing look and motioned for one of us to say something.

Fred finally opened his mouth, "Ahem...Well Hermione and I have some news  
>we're getting married. Let us explain before you interrupt Ron. See when Hermione got back today she was crying and<br>I was trying to make her feel better and mum came in and thought I was compromising her or something..."  
>George interrupted by laughing so hard he fell out of his chair.<p>

Fred smirked and continued, "Anyways as I was saying I made a joke that we were getting married or something a long those lines  
>and it turns out that there is a law that if a pureblood wizard says a witch will marry him it binds them in a contract saying they must<br>get married before the end of the year or they get sent to Azkaban." I finally looked up, seeing as I had been staring at the floor the entire time.  
>The first face I looked at was Ron's and I wish I had looked at anyone's but his. He looked furious and hurt all at the same time.<p>

Then Ron opened his mouth, "I don't see why you two are lying!" I gasped and Fred's face turned just as red as Ron's.  
>"What the bloody hell are you on about Ronald?" Fred's voice was dripping with venom. "You two have obviously been going at it behind my back,<br>you knew that I was in love with Hermione but instead of considering my feelings you just shack up with my woman!" At this I butted in, "First off Ronald  
>Fred is telling the truth we don't want to get married that's just what is going on so why don't you watch what your saying.<br>Second you never once told me how you felt so I was never yours." Ron looked like he was about to burst instead he stormed out  
>screaming curse words.<p>

Mrs. Weasley followed after him yelling about his language, after she hugged both Fred and me.  
>The rest of the Weasley's slowly got up and congratulated us and offered us to tell any of them if we ever needed anything.<br>I smiled despite Ron's reaction, which we both expected, the rest of the Weasley's were actually fine with anything of course  
>the first thing Ginny wanted to talk about was the wedding and asked if she was my maid of honor.<br>I smiled "Of course you'll be my maid of honor! Who else would I let drag me to every store to pick out the best dresses!"  
>Ginny smiled really big. Once we were alone in the room we share Ginny sat on the end of my bed. "So how are you really<br>feeling about marrying Fred?"

I sighed, "Well to be honest I don't know I'm not exactly thrilled about it, but at the same time I'm not really dreading it.  
>I've always harbored a small crush for Fred so maybe it wont be so bad being married to him.<br>Especially after started spending more time with each other during the summer and we became friends. I mean I honestly don't know  
>how to feel Ginny just this morning I still thought Ron and I would be the ones who would end up together and now I'm marrying his older brother<br>and I'll be lucky if I will ever even have Ron as friend anymore." With that I broke down and started crying.

"We've been through so much Ginny I just don't understand why this is happening.  
>I thought nothing would ever separate us after everything we had to go through during the Horcrux hunt and then the final battle<br>when we kissed but then he never mentioned it so I thought it was just a heat of the moment thing, then I thought maybe he would finally  
>come around and we would start dating now well, now there's no possibility of that I just don't want to lose him Ginny."<p>

Ginny put her arm around me. "Hermione it'll be okay Ron will come around you know how he is.  
>His feelings are just crushed right now and he's being selfish and not thinking about how bad you're hurting through all this.<br>I promise everything will work out. But now let's talk about this crush you have on my older brother!" I started blushing really hard.  
>We spent the rest of the night talking about Fred, then in turn talking about her and Harry.<p>

**Meanwhile in the twin's flat above the shop...**

"FRED!" George tackled his twin to the ground while laughing hysterically. "So you're getting married to the lovely Miss Granger this is not how I was expecting you two to get together  
>but it works all the same." Fred looked up at his twin who offered his hand to pull him up. "What are you on about now Forge I think all the fumes from the experiments have addled your<br>brains" George gave him a piercing look. "C'mon Gred I'm your twin do you honestly think I didn't know about your little crush on Hermione?"

Fred looked surprised. "I didn't think you could know things about me that I didn't even know until recently..." George started laughing. "So I have a good question are you telling me that  
>you didn't know about the law stating that you would have to marry the girl if you said you were getting married, because I specifically remember us both finding that law one night." Fred<br>stopped what he was doing and whirled around to where he was face to face with his twin.

"George if you really care about my well being you'll never mention that to anyone. If Hermione ever found out that I put us in this predicament knowingly she would curse me into oblivion  
>and you know it's true. Honestly I wasn't thinking when I said it she was sitting on my lap and I felt my heart breaking when I saw her crying I wanted to be the person who was always<br>there for her. Ron doesn't deserve her he never has. He never realized what was in front of his face all these years. I started noticing her in her 3rd year she started turning into a beautiful  
>young lady. I couldn't believe that Ron had never noticed her before. I just wanted her to notice me and that I was in love with her. I went about it the wrong way but I couldn't stand the<br>thought of her ending up with him." Fred admitted.

George looked Fred in the eye. "I know you weren't thinking but you know eventually the truth is going to have to come out and I promise I wont say anything but that doesn't mean I don't  
>think she deserves to know, because I do. I think she has every right to know but that's up to you. I'm happy if you're happy and I agree her and Ron would've never worked there just too<br>different. With you two you balance each other out. Welp I think I'm going to go to bed I have a really important date tomorrow and I don't need to look ragged because my git of a twin kept  
>me up all night with his lovey dovey confessions."<p>

Fred glared at him, "My confessions are far from lovey dovey and important date? Hmmm this wouldn't happen to be the date with the Miss Luna Lovegood would it?" George nodded with a  
>maniacal smile on his face. "Ahh my dear Luna she's so amazing I can't believe I never noticed her before she does have a way of showing her feelings thought doesn't she?" Now it was Fred's<br>turn to start laughing hysterically.

"If by a way you mean her showing up to the shop kissing you when you said hello then talking about how wrackspurts got into her and said she had to kiss someone she was attracted to."  
>George just smiled. "Hey there is nothing wrong with that! She really is an amazing person to be around she has away with people I just love listening to her. I'm almost as smitten as you are<br>with Granger."

Fred just shook his head. "I thought you were going to bed and seeing as I'm the better looking twin you need as much of your beauty sleep you can get." George just scoffed at him as he shut his  
>bedroom door. Fred started getting dressed for bed and let his mind wander. He really didn't know what was going through his mind when he said what he said. Well he did but he didn't want to<br>admit that he was that in love with Hermione. Well there was no fixing anything to do now. He needed to get some sleep seeing as him and her had a lot of wedding planning to go over with  
>Mrs. Weasley tomorrow.<p>

**Alright there we go third chapter up! Like I said before I just hope you enjoy reading it I know there are probably some grammatical errors seeing  
><strong>**as I write these after virtually no sleep not the point anyways no flames please I do hope you enjoy reading it though :) also sorry I had to add the  
>George and Luna in there they're my favorite pairing.<strong> **R&R Pleasseeee**


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